Chalk and Cheese

**** A word of warning...
if you are easily offended, tune out now!****
** I'm totally throwing out there all the stereotypes of Americans I know**
*You guys know I love you, right?*

Since joining this blog I've never had so much contact with Americans in my entire life.  Although we both speak English, have similar television programming (a massive portion of what we watch here is American) and similar lifestyles... there is soooo much that makes us different.

Firstly... Americans are fat?  Well... from the fine bitches I've come across in blogland, there ain't a lick of truth to it.

But if it is in fact true... I imagine it comes down to some of the following...

This stuff, you call cheese?

This shot was taken by a mate of mine 'Cupcake' while she was in Vegas, baby.  She calls it the awesome Vegas Sanga... I call it heart attack between 2 slices of bread (at least the lettuce looks nice and I'll give it props if it is on multigrain - can't really be sure)

It looks more like a couple of slices of paw paw, sitting on top of half a pig!

Ummmm... Hey dudes!  That is not cheese!  That's not even 51% cheese - amazing what you can find out via google.  Milk is not orange, therefore cheese should not be orange.

And while we are on the food bandwagon... sweets are sweets and should not be consumed before noon - unless you're on the blob - then a packet of jumbo TV Mix is more than fine.  Waffles with maple syrup for breakfast?  I'll never understand!  Toast with honey, yoghurt or banana smoothie is about as sweet as it should get.

Now, I'm probably spouting off every stereotype of an American diet as I possibly can... feel free to correct me.   Also feel free to make some kangaroo or 'throw another shrimp on the barbie' cracks.  (Kangaroo, incidentally, is a very lean red meat, is fantastic for the environment and devine on the palette - we eat it at least once a week - no bullshit... I should say 'we' is me and Micko not all Australians)

Back to my point though... hang on!  Was there one?

Oh yeah... I was outlining the subtle differences between cultures.

It might shock you to learn I've never had a peanut butter cup (is that what they are called - blogging was the first place I'd ever heard of this so called peanut butter cup) and I've never seen Jersey Shore.  The language thing, I usually get, cause I watch the TV...

One thing I do love... You're willingness to praise others.  As a vast generalisation, here in Australia, we tend to cut people down.  We don't like to praise others in case they 'get a big head'.  It's called Tall Poppy Syndrome and it's rife!

So now, I'm about to turn the tables...

I'm sure there are things that I've said that don't make a lick of sense to you... words I've used perhaps?  Statements I've made... things I've referred to?

So, today... Ask me anything about what confuses you... or anything you'd like to know about my life and/or Australia.

I'll answer everything as truthfully as I can.
Cause that's the way I roll!
What you see is totally what you get with me... I ain't got nothing to hide.

And you know what (almost the most famous Australians) ACDC said:

 'It's a long way to the shop if you want a sausage roll'.

Feel free to comment away... or use the contact me link and drop me a line.