Wednesday, October 20, 2010

I'm starting with the (wo)man in the mirror...

Most days I'd wake and look in the mirror and wouldn't like a single thing that's staring back at me.  It was a rare day that I'd be even slightly impressed. 

I'd beat myself up about my wrinkles, my grey hair, my moustache, my double chin, my thin eyelashes, my face cellulite (does anybody relate to the face cellulite??).  And that was just my face!  If I were to write a list of things that I didn't like about my body, I'd be here until the very end of time.

Let's just say that I'm not my biggest fan (physically - I actually do like myself as a person - quite a contradiction and I'm aware of that - but that's just the way it is... at this moment).

Surprisingly, this comes as an utter shock to most people I tell.  On the outside I seem so confident... and *shudder - their words not mine* attractive.

One thing I've come to realise is that the way I see myself, certainly isn't the way others see me.  Now, I'm no supermodel or oil painting - but I'm not the hideous monster that looks back at me from time to time. 

I'm me!  And I am beautiful... the sooner I embrace that, the better (oh I'm working on it).

Why is it that we are sooooo fucking critical of ourselves, but not of others?  (Well... I am - I can't say this relates to everyone because everyone hasn't had the same experience or belief system as I do - but I'm sure there are quite a few of you out there!)

See, the thing is... regardless of who you are, what you look like, what you've been though... there is someone out there that looks up to you.  Someone who wishes they could be as brave, strong, emotional, free, happy, slim, pretty, tall, big boobed, small boobed, arsey, funny, creative, smart, witty (I think you get the picture) as you are. 

I propose that each day... you tell at least one person, who wouldn't expect it, something that you admire about them. 

And if you are lucky enough to be at the receiving end of such a compliment, that you accept that compliment graciously.  Don't question it... Just accept it.  The truth shall set you free - as one would say.

Go forth and compliment,  people!


~KS said...

I think you are beautiful... but I also think we all struggle with seeing ourseleves as others do. We are always our own worst critics.

jprp said...

well i'd like to compliment you on your confidence, and ability to talk to anyone and make them feel like they are the most important person in the world at that time. Thats one of the many things I've admired about you. heres one of the ways I like to "spread the love"....

It's amazing how giving someone a little love can make your day, even if you never see the love being recieved.

PinkPatentMaryJanes said...

I'm really struggling with a comment here as I'm just so devastated that not only do you not see what everyone else sees - you see the complete opposite. I truly, honestly believe that every single person has something fabulous about them - and when they have their bad days they need to focus on that fabulousness and block everything else out. But I also believe that so much attention is placed on 'perfection' that those who feel they don't measure up don't even consider themselves 'nearly perfect' {not that there's any such thing} but instead discard themselves as 'not good enough'.

We've all got flaws - that's what make us individual and interesting. We've also got plenty of gorgeous in us - and you seem to have it inside and out. I hope you can learn to embrace it. Cos you know what? Moustaches, wrinkles, sags, bags etc - we've all got 'em. It's just that nobody else places a magnifying glass toward them - they just see the sparkling eyes, fabulous smile, great hair and hilarious personality!

Love to you lovely x

Brown Girl said...

I think we all go through this, you are beautiful and hilarious...I said so, so it's true! ;)

Alilea said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Alilea said...

Have a look at this picture...

what do you see?

It's all just a matter of perception and what we focus on.

I've found blurring my vision helps me see the energy that radiates, rather than details that I don't like..

Miss Manda said...

I was going to ask you how you knew my Aunty Gladys, but then I kept reading and saw you were talking about yourself.

Well, I don't recall seeing any of that shit on you - let alone face cellulite (?).

You're awesome and gorgeous and intelligent and witty and you have the guts to tell people what you really think of them - now THAT is something I wish I could do.

So take heart Karls and please start telling yourself how fabulous you really are. :) xxx

Christine Vi said...

It's a difficult issue to deal with. We're all taking second looks at ourselves and comparing ourselves to other people, wondering why we aren't more like him/her. It's such a horrible cycle, from confidence boosts to needing those confidence boosts.


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